Friday, March 28, 2008

BLACK: WHEN IN DOUBT WEAR IT OUT :)





“Not all black pants are created equal, Stacy says. "Invest a little more in a great quality fabric that drapes, skims the body, yet still has structure." Julia models basic black pants made by Akris (available at www.akris.ch and Neiman Marcus). These pants fit Stacy's two main criteria—they have a thick waistband that helps cinch the stomach and a slightly flared leg. Aside from the Akris black pants, Stacy suggests these less expensive styles: Theory's Max C, Chaiken's Laura, Banana Republic's Martin and Gap's Curvy.”

This is from Oprah’s Booty Basics: The Perfect Black Pants



All wardrobes need the “The Perfect Black Pants”. They are an essential go to item in the closet. I have a pair that I got at New York & Co. for $5.99, yes you heard me right $5.99. I wear them all the time. They are a good thing to wear to church, to work, and unfortunately to funerals. We ran into this problem early this week when a friend of Jessie’s Father passed away. Jessie wasn’t sure what to wear. I told her that wearing a nice pair of black slacks and solid nice blouse of some type would be fine.

Ok sorry I am gonna go on a tangent here. I hate it when I go to a funeral and there are girls there in halter dresses and clear heeled shoes. You haven’t seen that at a funeral? Well come to Alabama and you will. Hey I can say that I live here. So if you are one who has done this, don’t do it again.

There I’m better, any who where was I oh yes Black Pants. Wearing an incorrect pair of black pants can be as bad as the dreaded “Mom Jeans”.



Make sure when you purchase them that they fall at an appropriate length above the floor. Please no “Flooding” allowed. Also make sure that if the waist is higher that you don’t tuck your shirt in. It could cause a “mega butt”, you know you don’t know wear it begins or ends.

If you have hail damage going on like I do, grab you a pair of lycra type things. You know spanx or something like that. It will smooth everything out, and all will be right with the world.

Here are few examples of a good pair of black pants.







(Hey y'all when I was looking for pictures I ran across this last one. It came from Fussy's site back in October 2007.)



Here are some examples of what not to wear.
















Now go forth and find some if you don’t have them already. Remember you don’t have to spend a lot to look good! Oh yeah, go visit all the other fabulous ideas over at Fussy's.


Photobucket


33 comments:

gabriel said...

Actually, that last one... ummmm... that one was OK. ;)

jennifer said...

*whining* But VVAAALLLARIE, I wanna wear my stirrup pants! They are comfy and really look great over all of my dimples and wooples! PPLLLEEEAASE?

OK, not really. But if my hiny was a skinny as the chick in the picture, I would wear 'em if I wanted to. I have GOT to get into shape - well actually I am in shape. BLOB is a shape isn't it?

be blessed.

Jen

Nadine said...

Can I look like those ladies in the good pictures? :)

Valarie said...

Gabe... Ummm .....NO


Jennifer if you must wear them I guess it will be ok,just don't ask me to be seen with you. :) By the way like your new photo, pretty eyes.

Nadine, I tried findin pictures of average size women, and guess what? Very hard to find.

Sister Honey Bunch said...

I love those black pants. Not the stirrup ones. The others.

fullheartandhands mama said...

Great tip!

Baby Mamma aka Tamra said...

I was just at a funeral and I know exactly what you mean! Apparently it's okay to wear club wear at a funeral home. Who knew? Maybe they were going dancing afterwards.
Love black pants!

We are THAT family said...

I laughed at the stirrup pants. Never did wear leather, my people are real glad about that one.

You've got me thinking? Do I own a smashing pair of black pants?

I may need to shop!

Joy said...

I love black pants!! Seriously- club attire at a funeral?!

jennifer said...

Valarie Lea from Tennesse came to live in Alabam-y......

If you want to find out how that ends, come back to Mister Roger's neighborhood! Hey, and it involves a reward for YOU!

(had to update the last post, got caught up in the receiving part and forgot about giving. OOPS)

Melody said...

LOL! I love the pictures of the karate pants, leather slack and OMG, do I remember the stirrup pants! Great post - Thanks!

Darla said...

I agree with buying quality clothing - at affordable prices that is.

Go into "expensive" stores and try on those clothes to SEE what they look and FEEL like. THEN, hit up your local consignment shop or ebay, etc. for the same brand at a 1/4 of the cost!

Really good stores (such as coldwater creek) generally run the "same size" in all their clothes so it's not a hard guess as to what size to buy.

SUPER POST!

Kendra said...

I simply love the 1st three pairs of black pants.....
With that being said, I am hoping to never find the remaining pants in my closet!

Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm leaving a comment! How are my black pants today, ok? Also, clear heals should NEVER been worn, unless you are dancing on a pole! So there I said it, so if you don't want to be thought of in that way, don't wear them!

Jane @ What About Mom? said...

Saddest funeral I have ever been to was one where the some of the kids and grandkids of this sweet woman were wearing grubby t-shirts and jeans and crappy tennis shoes. One of the men had this huge key ring clanging and rattling all the time. So distracting and disrespectful.

Love black pants! And have to agree that if I looked that good, I might even wear those stirrup pants!

Valarie said...

Jessica (aka) Anonymous your black pants are great. I was probably with you when you bought them. Clear shoes definitely should be saved for pole dancing.

Dawn said...

Hello!

Love your blog - I linked to your site from Pioneer Woman.

Love black pants! Put on just about any top and you're out the door!!!

Dawn

Valarie said...

Gotta love a good pair of black pants! I know I do :-)

JJ said...

Great post! I love black pants, but I sure wish I could find some that don't attract cat hair. That's never a good look.

Michelle@Life with Three said...

I have been on the lookout for some black pants for at least a year. What do you think the best fabric is for black pants. I found a lot of synthetic type fabrics, which I'm not sure I like for every day wear. Maybe a cotton blend.

Lisa said...

Let me see.....if I look hard enough, I bet I can find a picture of Valarie in stirrup pants. :)

Find me some pictures of fat girls (like me) that look that good in black pants.

Next week, instead of finding "bad" photos on the internet, you could just come over to the house and take my picture. :)

Lisa

Valarie said...

Oh Lisa, Lisa, Lisa, have you learned nothing from your sister. You can look good in black pants. Those are just models, figments of our imagination. They do make pants to fit us all. Any shape and size. I will go shopping with you again if you promise not to call me a twirp. :)

Valarie said...

Oh and have I told you how wonderful of a sister you are lately?

Things that are in our past (stirrup pants) should stay in our past.

Kimmie said...

Great Post Valerie!

I need a great pair of black pants! My closet is so outdated. I really have to invest in some new clothes. Oh good gracious, the stirrup pants! I remember them...ugh I say! lol...never wore leather pants, they were not comfortable the very first time I tried them on so that was the end of that! I do love my leather coat though. Everyone should have a sassy leather in their wardrobe!

I love the show "What Not To Wear" on TLC...it is so fun to watch. I have learned so much from it too. I love when the use the term "a pop of color". I get such a kick out of it.

Thanks for visiting my blog today! My daughter plays with her friends in a bar league now. I am not crazy about it being a bar league, but the fact that she dosn't go to it afterwards makes me happy. She just still loves the sport and she is such a girlfriend with all her friends. They do so much together when she isn't with he BF. I am happy that your daughter likes the sport. Kids in sports is such a positive thing. :-)

Hugs,
Kimmie

www.genesismoments.com said...

That's great. I loved the slim and trim pictures and then totally laughed when I saw the not-so-great ones. So, I have to give up my leather ones now? Just kidding. No such thing in my closet. I have plenty of mom jeans though!

gabriel said...

Ha! Way to go, Lisa! I considered mentioning that the first time I ever saw stirrup pants were on Valarie.

Pink and Paisley. :-)

Valarie said...

Just remember Gabe and Lisa, Just like you have incrementing pictures of me, I have the same of y'all. (Mwahaha laughs maniacally)

Love y'all

mah-meeee said...

Hi Valarie, thanks for stopping by my blog!

It is so true about black pants (or any other pants at that.) I actually really love the old navy yoga pants. After having to go back to work after 3 months of maternity leave, these pants are just perfect for that post kids tummy. I dont' have to worry about the buttons or zippers getting lost in my blubber when I sit down!

Btw, I need to go visit Alabama to see them girls in halters and CLEAR heels at a funeral.

Mackenzies Momma said...

I LOVE all those pants. I saw an adorable pair of black pants today at NY & Co when I was buying my little black dress.

Lisa said...

Look at you! 30 comments. You are blogging in the big leagues now.

Wanna go to a craft show with me and Mama tomorrow?

BTW, Thanks for the props Gabe. Lets all go through our photos and see what we can find of Valarie. I especially want to find the ones when she was about 10 with glasses and baaaaaaddddddd perm. However, she is right. She can come up with some bad ones of us too. I don't care do you?

gabriel said...

No, Lisa. I have nothing to hide. Post away, Valarie. I do not care. It would even be worth it.

But the photos that I really want are the ones of my brother Josh in drag. Seen those lately?

HRH said...

Fun post. I have a great pair that I call my magic pants because they add about 6 inches to my height and make me lose 12 pounds (visually).

Cindy Swanson said...

Excellent post, Valarie! I found your blog through Mrs. Fussypant's links.

By the way, it's not just Alabamans that dress horribly for funerals. I live in Northern Illinois, and I occasionally sing at funerals. I'm amazed at the way some people dress for them, even close relatives of the dearly departed. Revealing tops, ragged jeans, flip flops... I've seen it all.

Then again, it seems like people dress down for EVERYTHING these days...

Enjoyed visiting your blog!